*alexandra*
*amanda*
*cheryl f*
*christine*
*claudia*
*geraldine*
*jasme*
*bro*
*wan ying*
*winnie*
*2r6'06*
*TG*
*S-LC*
*S.H.E*
*stickgirl*
*yan tong*
*yu jing*




Coding/Design: Yours-Tragically
Icons: Enlaced

my mind is in a whirl. today, i can finally sit down and think of what is important to me. i admit for the last few days i have been escaping, running away, occupying myself with this and that, because im afraid, and i don't want to think about the future. but then, escaping is never a solution, so i might as well truly think about it.

for your information, i think most of the time. about anything. there is hardly a moment when im not thinking. it's pretty scary. even if im sleeping, sometimes im thinking too. it shows in my dreams.

if rs dreams about spirits and very haunting stuff, i dream about people. people around me and what could possibly happen. if im worried about somebody and i feel guilty towards the person, i will dream of the person. if i wish that this could happen i dream of it. it is very real, and because everything i dream of is like, real and existing, it is scary in its own way. also, sometimes i confuse the dreams with reality. so much so that when i realise it, i feel disappointed because i want the dream to happen. to turn into reality.

back to what im supposed to be thinking. i got sidetracked, again. zz. well, although i tell people not to compare themselves with those who are intelligent, it still gets difficult when you see your results and theirs. i mean, those people are BORN smart, we shouldn't compare because we are different. but then again, you still feel that life is unfair when you see all the work you put in and then you see your results. no one said life was fair. are we supposed to accept this?

maybe. maybe we should just accept that this is our limit and if we continue to force ourselves to hang on, it is not going to work. this is not giving up. this is knowing our limits. for some people, they can thrive in different conditions. i heard a lot of stories, and i discovered, no matter where you are, as long as it is suitable for you, you will succeed. 行行出状元。i believe in this and i will continue believing.

vivien, you may not read this, but i just want to tell you, it is never too late. i believe that you and jasme will surely succeed, in your own way, that we could never will. i thank you for everything you have done for us-im truly touched. will miss you. =)